hello there... i'm so glad it's summer! finally no more school... anyways, i'm not doing really much this summer, going to hope and JESUS FEST!! in july and camping right before school starts. but in between i'm hoping to get some sort of a job and have lots of fun!

i haven't really spent very much time with God in a while, i was SO busy this past week getting ready for exams and babysitting and stuff.. but.. ya i want God to be first. it seems like other things are becoming more important. i feel so damp and like.. not excited about God or anything.. it really sux, and i know i can just change it if i change myself and my attitude, but it's hard, and idn... i just don't know.. and i guess that's a bad thing. i havn't found/had/made even 20 freakin minutes with God this past week until today! and seriously, you feel so good after, like you spent your time well. i'm already sick of watching TV. it's so pointless.. in fact, so is this stupid computer. i know it, but why do i still waste my time on them?? "we were meant to live for so much more, have we lost ourselves?" can we realise that God is the only thing worth our time? will we ever know how entertained we can be from God if we just let him? can't we just stop living empty lives? can't we just stop looking everywhere else to fill us up, when we know that God's sitting right there calling us to recieve his love... ugh i annoy myself sometimes. the more i think about it.. the more i know that relationships are the most important thing in life. relationship with God, and with others.
"He who dies with the most toys is, nonetheless, still dead."
anyways.. ya i really want to be excited about getting to know God, i want to be passionate again, i want to want to go to church. i want to live again! at church i totally just zoned out during worship.. i sang the words, but didn't think of them.. so so empty. a waste of time! be real guys, mean what you say, speak life, not death. love. that's all that life was meant for. love.

here's some James 4:7-10 double action!
"So let God work his will in you. Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper. Say a quiet yes to God and he'll be there in no time. Quit dabbling in sin. Purify your inner life... Get serious, really serious. Get down on your knees before the Master; it's the only way you'll get on your feet."(MSG)

"Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded... Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up."(NIV)

make me whole
make me clean
make me pure as gold again